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Wednesday, June 25, 2008

i'm all messed up

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last june 11 super happy kame ni honey...We've planned everything and thought it was all settled .. until confusion came along ..We have to think and plan more about the matter , but the fact bout it really made us both excited and of coarse happy ... as time goes along, people around us knew our feeling of excitement about , and proud became more intense.. later that before a typhoon frank made a disaster in the country, i felt sick, quite depressed and afraid ... Afraid of the hopes would result into false one..because of the signs and symptoms i am experiencing, i was really depressed. then time for the truth and confirmation for what i am panicking bout..a really a sad thing..false hopes are now for real ..the excitement vanish and change into deep sadness ..i realize i was spreading a false/ fake /untrue event of my life..But how can it be?? i had an evidence and two of my peeps saw it!..my questioned answered this way.."there was a conception happened but the participants were weak and didn't able to make any progression so it had to break down resulted to what was your questioned of..good thing on it you don't have to undergo such dx to be fine..your gradually fine and capable of hoping for the next better time...fatigue may also be a factor but ourself knew bout the lifespan and the life cycle" .. really the feeling of the world duped o n your shoulder literally we felt, but i knew we had to continue ..move on.. look at the positive way around ..we talk..decided and think and act as it didn't occur..now were moving on..dat'z life cope up and manage stress carefully...tho i know as i act now, i know i wasn't moving on yet or i juz don't want anybody see me like this..feel my sadness and notice I'm incomplete..i know i can came back easily not a couple of time but juz time..i'll be back to what i used and others used to knew me..

yah..our bertday,what a happy day!!!

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yah..its our b-day today..what a happy day di'ba hon?!nwei..we advanced our celebration na kahapon kc busy na from work today..shopping lng nmn sa market market tska nuod muvie sa hauz..hehe..celebration nb un?!basta we're together that's the important thing..grabe,power 'tong hon ko..ntatagalan ako sa mga kalokohan ko sa kanya..hehe..and know what we're even getting stronger each day..kc i love her and i know that she loves me too..khit ganu pa kabigat prob ngagawan ng paraan(hopefully!)..basta hon wag ka po mgbbago ha..patience lng saken..konti pa..lalo n ngaung malapit na anniv nten..kung sinasabi mong blessed ka for having me..how much more ikaw saken,really blessed! That's why i believed that God is good kc for all the foolishness i've done against Him,still He gave you to me..asteeg db?! You gave me direction and goals in every things i do!tnx hon for that..Wag ka mgsawa and MORE power to you..hehe..I love you and God bless us!!!mwahh..mwahh..sarap pla mgpost d2..cnxa first time eh..mwahh 

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

another birthday!yehey!..

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I'm sick..tototong my sakit aq(ill ba!)..haba ng vacation nmen miss q n din c badz at c bunso..saya naman this day kc inaalagaan aq ni honey actually khapon pa nga..sweet ni honey kahit minsan hindi halata..hehehe..love you so much honey..salamat sa lahat..swerte at sarap talagang mahalin ng isang felix jr... happy monthsarry honey..thank you for being always on my side..

Thursday, June 19, 2008

im on a change..

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i've change my page template..i feel like the first one was quite childish like blog..(but i do like that 13 months of sunshine) I love the creations of the goddest of pinoybloggers...i just want a skin which represents me .. the thoughts, the acts , the life and most especially the feelings i do express through the time i was blogging...emo..Lol..actually i just found myself hunger for this skin..courtesy of leiyah that's why my supposedly contentment, now longed for such beyond the expected one.. (sorry for the blame hahaha)...for now i just want to welcome my new skin coz i'm not yet ready to write all those stuffs, sitch and escapades happened in my life recently.. a lot to tell so(write).. but the best of the best things happened recently is that we're (honey and i) finally okay and happy..soooo happy... ciao!

Saturday, June 14, 2008

happy-not?...

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im a hapi but i am not?...hmm confusing ayt?..there were sitch that i shud be happy but the other way around i am not.. what shud i do..how will i gain a one good feeling regarding to the "confusing" matter?..haixx..hardz nman netech!..so thankful p din jan p rin c honey..haixx...waaaa anu na..bkit b d q din ma ipost/maisulat ung dapat?..natatakot b q?but i want to be proud din at the same time!hala dumadami na ung nakakalito..taeng life nmn uh!..T_T

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

don't i deserve??

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so sad..sad.. sad..sad..(sigh)...the guy has all the gutts to ignore..fuck! really fuck!.. just waiting for some cue..but wtf the guy wears all the drama..lakas ng loob!.. pucha!..eversince the man never said what just wanted to be heard.. the guy do expresses but never been said... a simple sorry with sincerity.. a feeling of really sorry... the most insensitive one..nice!..also not a thoughtful one didn't make any way to make up..not even thought if that someone already ate late at night? w.t.hell!..this guy may thought that the other half was the toughest among, that also a guy and do feel like a guys!..sheet!does they really knew each other?...now its a mess.. wondrin'..really wondrin' accompanied by confusion!.. shit! shit! shit!

Monday, June 9, 2008

this is for you

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u know how much i love you..auq ng ganito..ung nararamdaman qng iinis at sama ng loob m sken sa mga nagagawa mong ksalanan na ayon sau "hindi m n nmn alam"..kelan k mag iisip bago kumilos?..kelan m q iisipin habang nag iisip k din para sa iba..naghihintay aq, nagppacnxa dahil mahal kita..auq mwala ang lahat,,pero hanggang kailan kita hihintayin at pagpapacnxahan.. para sau mga simpleng bagy b to?..simple na pinpalaki q b?.. sna maramdaman m din ung nararamdman q para d m masabing cmple n mga bagay lang..para hindi m msabi na "para un lang".. nbbypass m nko..ego,pride pagkatao.. pero balewala lang sau..sana maggrow nmn tau maggrow k nmn..hindi k ngkukulang sken, bnbgay materyal n pangangailangan q..sna matandaan m mas kelangan kita ung pagmamahal m, pagiging considerate sincerity at malawak n pang unawa/pang intindi.. sana maauz nten to..kasi talagang nasasaktan nko.. paulit ulit n lang..kinakalimutan m akala m auz na..hindi aq magtatanim kung isang beses lang..tao lang marunong magtanda... honey pls..

i'm full

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i'm all fed up..napipikon n talaga q..bkit b pag my hassle sunud-sunod..bakit kelangang strike 2!.. un ang mahirap pag maxado ng maraming investment sau kahit gusto m mgalit mahihiya kang magalit xempre nga nmn masasabhan k ng para un lang at maxadong ng-iinarte or worst pinapalaki pa isyu..anu magagawa q eh pikon nko!.. auq matali sa utang n loob kaya nga pinagsisilbihan ei para man lang mkabawi ng paunti-unti... yan na nmn ang putang inang di cnsadya!..aup na dahilan nakakapuno talaga!.. wala magpapaka insensitive lang un.. lagi nmn ganun..lagi hindi naiintindihan at laging hindi alam..wat if i try to quit?..ngayon na mukhang there's something hmmm.. y not?..mukhang everything is going into worst nmn(pertaining to my own life ha..)kung samen man d p nmn ganun kworst..kaya pang ideny.. kaya pang magpretend na there's nothing wrong..astig nuh..nalulungkot nmn aq soobra..anu ba tamang gawin..keep in silence.. o ipaalam n na i'm feeling this na.. i rily don't know what to do..all i know is now i'm hurting.. i really am.. do i play a maryr type n b?..ihad this feeling na somehow auq malaman nia.. dhil eventually makakalimutan or maauz din..(sana) wat if this crap continues?.. can i? can i still hide for this.. nararamdaman q na nalulungkot n ko.. sa tambak na atraso .. sa iisang ofenz.. sa paulit ulit na sitch na sasagutin k lang ng pesteng "hindi q nmn alam"... matutuwa kb nun?..hayy it's true that life sucks!..an i feel the shit!..auq maging mean n! pero auq din maging bum nman for good!..

Sunday, June 8, 2008

is it me?or the sitch otherwise.....

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hindi q alam kung panu explain..pero auq din ng issue..gusto q lang mgblog para kahit papano maibsan or bka mkahelp mareleive..napapancn q lang, pag mahal m b talaga kelangan m mgsakripisyo..khit cmple lang pero kelangan b talaga o mas tamang salita eh kelangan m umintindi..kelangan m magsumiksik para mameet ung needs nio xempre..ganun din nmn mangyayari sa kabilang side..pero panu kapag as in libre n..dhil nga sa almost kau n lagi mgksama kakasiksik m sa skedyul nia nag nangyayari "LAGI" n nmn tau magkaxama..spare sometime to the others nmn..tama nga nmn di ba nakakasuffocate nmn ata kung lagi kaming 2 n lng..so the best out of it..magkasya k sa alloted time n para sau at ung libre the best u can do is wag n umasa..un lang..cmple na di kumplikado..d kp masasaktan..pero sa totoong sitch sa oras na to..naiiyak aq sa reyalisayon..wla q magagawaganun tlaga..u don't want to loose the person..SACRIFICE..

Friday, June 6, 2008

damned!bum

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it's a dull feeling if somebody whom u used to lean unintentionally leave u behind..that she/he did what just she/he think was right and nice for others but turned negatively towards u...the fact that situation has good intentions but the outcome did not as expected...so what to do then. the one felt dull had to make it up so for the things, acts etc. have been done..it's not just only pride but also an attitude!.leave something for someone .. the least the person could have is his/herself when everything was ruined..be composed and independent.. leaning onto others will not help a person to grow, avoid being dependent so that no one will follow as well..be a model with the constituents....otherwise be independent so u should be the one to be leaned with and can stand loud and proud... culture affects a lot..hate to say but it was a real bullshit! ,,l,,

Thursday, June 5, 2008

criticism!

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cmula ng lumabo ung channel 2 namen i had no choice but to watch at channel 7..unfortunately we haven't had a cable pa kc..so my choice is limited..upon watching napansin q lang majority ng muvees or programs made by the said network andaming kelangan i edit..it was not about the story, actually okay ung mga wento but the prob is ung mga actions and role playing ng mga artist sablay..daming pwedeng comment how come people just watch muvee just to laugh or my mapanood lang..iisa isahin q po ung mga napancn q..actually sa dami nakalimutan q n ing iba.. i don't know the title ung my ghost effect ALMIRA(jennelyn mercado series) cnubaybayan q xa kc natuwa aq some hints lang * c wendel ramos doctor xa dun pero d nia tamang naisuot ung stethoscope nia..at hindi xa convincing sa cnsbi nia coz of how he deliver in authority his lines! *ung nurse s mental n un n kung san nconfine c sunshine dizon my nurse n my dalang chart nka headcap at nakasabit ang stet sa leeg but my God!NAKATSINELAS! d ba un napancn ng director??kahit b n xtra un!give focus! *ung path ng kwento pagdating s the end paikot ikot!if that was they were calling na twist??d hell non sense ang twist!..twist in a muvee is not as crap like that! kaputol ng isang awit(napapanood q lang s bus from duty) *kanina nabaril c lovey poe rite side ng tummy ung tinamaan but nakahawak c lovey s left side didn't she aware kung san ang tma nia?..knowing the person whom hurt alam nia din kung san hahawak kc dun masakit!..pag sumakit ba ulo m s tyan k hahawak?? *ung doctor emergency ung case but he is taking time na palabas labas ng e.r..una nia cnv kelangan masalinan ng dugo..whether my stock or wla sa blood bank dapat nasabi nia n sa relatives kung cno my blood type same as the pt to altirate if ever..besides dapat nga naicheck nia n agad un with the nurses bago xa lumabas to tok with the relatives! babangon ako at dudurugin kita *c patrick(super twins din) police or nbi agent sa super twins police b un ang lamya humawak ng baril!my god hirap ng training ng mga police kea mlabong my malamya dun! (sa bbangon nmn)..ibuko kb ng superior m n ikaw ang asset sa harap ng mga kalaban??xempre my alagad pa un at nsa panganib lyf nung agent..dpat db remain undercover xa!hay hay hay un lang po ang napancn q..whew!..

Monday, June 2, 2008

hay..

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yari absent aq 1 day sa blog kuh..nalungkot nmn daw aq..eh nmn d nmn mkapagkwento ng nice kapag tipsy db?..well then wat hapen bout the reunion??hmmm aun ok nmn masaya pa din at as usual alak pa din..nice to see dio agen!..gosh nainggit nmn aq so adorable ang built ni dio..xala!..and talking bout rhea nmn the first if 2 gurl n ngpaiyak sken on defending the case..she's quite pretty..and i think crush q na xa..hehehe..she is..she was..nakakatuwa talaga... dio,rhea and venus xempre ang inyo pong lingkod...ehem