Totally Wounded

I still can't believe that you're gone. Wala na yung mgtatanggol at mgsasaway everytime kuya Mike and I had petty arguments. I once told Jess that I am not even reaching the DABDA stages. Feels like I am in illusion that everything had happened was just a bad dream and now it's over and you back on working night shift and or day shift. That I am just unable to check you in your house. That you were just too busy playing clash of clans and can't even get out of your home. Seems everything is not sinking in. Not on the moment that I am about to seek justice for you. I feel like I am full of anger and hatred . Not to anyone else but to those who have let you suffered too much. I am trying to console myself that it was really meant to happen as it is because His(God) will. The lousy accident, the unquestionable bruises inside your body stating that need not to questioned what had happened. The thing that made me furious and full of anger were the people behind. I am just human, I accept the fact that it is God's will but  I am not able to forgive those people. Who am I going to forgive wherein no one is taking responsible of the accident. I don't know how long will I feel empty and unhappy. I really feel that something's missing. Though were not constantly seeing but the time you and Ate moved in here made me feel excited where I dreamed and we planned of us having good times more than the usual .How can it be if you're not here anymore? How can we have inuman sessions wherein our eldest cannot go in our flow. How can we both laugh unto somebody else and somebody else fault/ life drama. How can we laugh and be mean to our neighbor while you as the good guy and me the villain. I can do such stuff with anyone but it's different doing it with you. I really misses you Kuya. You were more than a tropa than a brother. I rarely received sermon from you. I remember the first and last time you slapped me when I was denying that I am not drunk and I puke in front of you come next morning you apologized and told me not to hide from you for you to know on how to cover me up. These were just memories. Till next time Kuya Chris.

Let It Go

I have been trying to learn the other platform but seems that it was not meant for me. If that so, I will content myself here at blogger wherein I can almost say somehow I master it all. I am not a quitter when it comes to discovering new things but then again I have no choice. I have to minimize my time spending in front of a computer since my eyes were not doing good and it make me suffer much of giving me a severe headache. And in my current condition any type of pain will not be of help. I still have pending promises to Ferry about her blogs and I will surely make it but not that in an instant. And I know she will understand because she loves me. (mwuahness) Good thing to her even though she can afford a customizable logo design pricing , she still prefers my work and I appreciate it much of her trust to me. Two to Three hours a day enough to make her wishes for her blog be possible.

OD Missed Me

Hahaha I'm feeling it too much.lol My title seem to be bragging how I am important to my recent company. It's because they don't want to give me up and I am feeling it too much. I'm mean and I knew that duh!.lol! I am so much thankful that they did appreciated me and my effort . The operation manager keeps on reaching me and bargaining to me not just to leave the company. This maybe the result of my 2 months best performance I showed. I already submitted a resignation letter to my supervisor prior I leave work. The reason I didn't want to discuss it with the operation manager because I know she will not let go of me . She's so nice that even extent my benefits though I am not yet a regular employee. I appreciated it much but I don't think I will deserve it all since I am not sure if I can get back to the company after I gave birth.As much as I don't want to leave them I have no choice but to decide. I chose to instead of compromising the health of my soon first born. I have a very delicate pregnancy which I least expected. But for my baby's sake I will give up whatever I am with now just to take care of him/her. Besides this is also a strict rule of my hubby. For now I will content myself helping my hubby running the business and some pay per click services offered online that I can be part of. Here in the blogosphere I have heard a lot of work at home moms. If they can do it, well I have faith that I also can. Wish me luck. *winks*

It's My First Time

(Peeking on my computer while mom is away.) Mom prohibits me to sit in front of my pc since I've got the worst case of sore eyes as per the doctor said.

Way back in schooldays I kept on praying to have a sore eyes. I have experienced that all of my friends have it and I was the only one not infected and I felt out of place.lol. I wanted to also have it so that I can have a valid reason to leave for school. When I am already at the nursing school I appreciated much that  I never got infected since this was a sign that I have a strong immune system against this virus. Still I am asking to experience this just this once. And now that I have it, I can say it was not that good and I hate it then. My upper lid were swelling and I can make an audition into any artist center since my tears easily fell down and it was continuously. This is my fourth day infected and both eyes were now infected and seems like my whole face were swelling. 

This shows that I am not as healthy as before. I am weakened by staying at home. lol. 

Got to end this post, I hear mom's foot steps. Will blog hop soon.

My Name on Them

I only had a very short name. It only consist of six letters and pronounced as two syllables. I always ask my mom why she named me that short. Also keep bugging her for my nickname when I was a child. As I grew and have friends I still wanted to a pseudo name which is somehow way differ from my real name. I envy those who can have guy nicknames whether they were a girl or vise versa. Or names a lot different from the real name. I have two, only two person call me differently and I love hearing my name on them! Maybe I can say due to my frustration having a nickname that make me love the way they address me.

First was Kristal of Krystallos Fidere. She was my classmate from Kinder to Grade 5. She was a very dear friend of mine and a partner in crime. Never knew she will end of being a proof reader when I was looking back on our old days. If I am naughty, she was twice of me. If I am frank convert twice as her. She calls me "Kar". Sounds like a car. But it feels music to my ears..She was the only person call me that name..Whenever and wherever she saw me.

Next was my architect super friend Nikki.  He is my childhood playmate and currently guy best friend. He calls me "Ren". I don't know why and how come he call me that way wherein our common friends calls me my whole name. [Maybe he has a lazy mouth :P] I once told him to call me "Renz". This was the name my fellow mountaineer friend calls me but he opt to. I don't know why we became good friends but he has a lot disgusts in me and he verbalized. Yet he chose to tell his sin biography and life journey,success and failures  to me :p With the two person I mentioned here, they already spelled correctly my name the way they address me.. Kar from Kristal and Ren from Nikki..KARREN. This is how my real name spells.

And I felt like those two sung my name.. It's good to here that way from them.

Summer at My Corner

 I was just so happy that I post in front of my PC harharahar

Hi Everyone! I supposed to be on leave but since I kept on reading my stuffs from time I posted it here maybe I just need some break, besides its Sunday! And I would like to take advantage of this privilege!hahaha.. It's summer here in my corner! I just feel like changing my template with my own effort..hehehe Hope all of you dear will not be tired of visiting me here!This is the only way I can enjoy summer. In blogging..haha I cannot afford or rather I am not allowed to go to beaches not until I got my liscense on August! Hmmm [konting tiis na lang] Day after I received my license I can have fun,fun,fun! 

P.S 

Kindly include me in your prayers for succeeding this fight..Thank you so much!.. I missed you bigtime! 

5 Months at Rest

I have to take leave on using computer and internet.That means also abandoning my corner and my new friends as of the moment. But guys and ate's this is not for good. It's just that I have to be more focused. And that leave will take for 5 consecutive months from this day on . This is a scheduled post. I have to take seriously my goal. I have to give much of my time on my priorities. Maybe for some time I can check this blog and visit who still dropped by and the guys in my blog list of coarse. I've been thinking of this decision for quite 2 months ago. And it was really really a hard decision to make. I feel like I can't make it but I have too and a must to do! It's not that I lost our internet connection( which will my mom would not allow if that so), and I am also not selling my pc.(I am explaining hahaha). I really have to be focus and take things seriously. Since the blog test I answered recently said that I was a life blogger, I think I will still have time to write it on my notebook but I cannot post it on time here or I will just ask my Huny to post it for me.Which I guess a rare thing he will do. Thank you po to those who can still visit me tho I cannot visit back. But soon as fifth month end I will surely be a hop-aholic and reviewer for the posts that I will miss.